


save me, save you

by stayzen



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Bullying, Falling In Love, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, Happy Ending, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Kissing, M/M, Strangers to Friends to Lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-14
Updated: 2019-04-14
Packaged: 2020-01-12 22:01:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18455462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stayzen/pseuds/stayzen
Summary: Donghyuck gets harshly bullied in school for being gay. When no one else cares, he gets help from an unexpected person: the school's 'bad boy' and an alleged criminal, Mark Lee, who usually keeps to himself and who everyone is afraid of. From there on Donghyuck gains so much more than he ever could have thought.





	save me, save you

Donghyuck takes a deep breath and then pushes the school’s front door open. The Christmas vacation is over and it is time to come back to hell. It was amazing; two and half weeks without having to think about school or the people who go there. But everything good must come to an end at some point. Donghyuck steps inside.

He can feel the dirty looks he gets while walking along the corridor, he doesn’t even have to look up to confirm. It has been like that for the last six months. When Donghyuck started high school, for some reason he was immediately labeled as the weird kid that no one should hang out with. It was like that for two years. It was fine actually; Donghyuck was left alone. Sure, it doesn’t feel all too glorious to be completely alone all the time, but it is manageable.

But then the third and last year started and everything changed. Somehow somebody figured it out that Donghyuck is gay. And then he wasn’t left alone anymore. No, quite the opposite actually. The bullying started slowly but surely. First name-calling, dirty looks and coming up with rumors about Donghyuck. Then things like stealing his backpack and scattering all the stuff inside around a classroom or corridor when there were no teachers around. And after that it finally started to get physical.

People would try to make Donghyuck trip, shove him while walking past, push him against the lockers and so on. And it isn’t just few people who do this. The whole school is full of homophobic assholes. If people don’t actively participate in the abuse, they still just happily let it happen.

It is always done when the teachers don’t notice. Not that Donghyuck thinks that the teachers would even care if they knew. They are tired enough with their own problems. And besides, Donghyuck doesn’t want any teachers to know. That could end up them telling his parents. And that would be even worse than any kind of bullying in the school.

Donghyuck’s parents are very strict, old-fashioned and very homophobic. Donghyuck can’t even count how many times he’s been told that homosexuality is wrong. What is right, is to get good grades in school, go to university, get a degree, get a good job and then get a beautiful wife and couple of kids. The usual.

So obviously Donghyuck hasn’t told them that he’s gay, and he intends to keep it that way. He gets good grades in school to please his parents, and always acts like everything is good. Donghyuck’s parents think that Donghyuck is everything they've ever wanted from their only child and Donghyuck lives in a lie to keep the peace in the family.

Only five months left, Donghyuck thinks. Five months and then high school is over. Then he doesn’t have to see these people ever again. Then he can pack his bags and move somewhere far away to study something he’s actually interested in. Move somewhere and start all over. Move far enough away to somewhere where he doesn’t have to hide who he is. Five months, he can do it.

Donghyuck walks into the classroom where his first class of the day is. There is already many students inside. Donghyuck takes a seat in front of the teacher’s desk. It’s the safest seat to sit in, and he always tries to get it if possible.

“Oh, no, the faggot is still here! If was hoping so badly that you could have like, died during the vacation”, someone shouts from the back of the class and bunch of people burst out laughing. Donghyuck doesn’t turn to look at them, he just sits there, staring in front of him and tries not to let the words affect him. This is nothing new, you can take it, he tells himself. Luckily the teacher comes to the classroom and they start the class.

  
\-------

  
The week goes mostly without bigger incidents. There’s nasty talk about Donghyuck, few shoves here and there and one coffee spilled over him. Not too bad, Donghyuck thinks. It is really sad that he starts to feel like these kinds of things aren’t that bad anymore. But that’s the thing. When you get hurt one too many times, you just start to slowly accept it and to be too tired to care anymore.

On Friday there is a bigger incident though. The bell signals the last class of the day to be over and everyone packs their stuff and head out of the school. Donghyuck opts to wait in the classroom for a while so that the other students leave first. When he thinks that the coast is clear, he exits the school building. He’s just out of the gate, when he gets ambushed.

There are four guys. One of them rips Donghyuck’s backpack from his back, opens it and scatters everything inside to the ground. When Donghyuck tries to reach to get his bag back, another one shoves him hard. Donghyuck rams against the school’s stone fence. His head hits to the hard stone and his eyesight blurs a little. The guys laugh.

“What the hell do you think you are doing?” suddenly an angry voice is heard behind the bullies. The guys stop laughing and turn to look who is the one disturbing them. Donghyuck shuts his eyes for a second, trying to get rid of the dizzy feeling, before opening them again and looking at the person who interrupted the situation.

It is Mark Lee.

Mark Lee is the so-called ‘bad boy’ of the school. He’s the one who always wears black clothes, leather jacket and combat boots. His hair is dark red and there are multiple piercings dangling on his ears. Mark is often late or absent from the classes, and when he’s present, he doesn’t really seem to care about the teaching.

Mark has this scary aura emanating from him. That’s probably why instead of being everyone’s secret crush like it usually goes with the bad boy, everybody is actually a little scared of him. People are convinced that Mark is a criminal and a part of a gang. Even the teachers think so. Times to times Mark has bruises on his face and hands, that everyone assumes come from fights he gets into with his gang.

Mark always keeps to himself and people let him. No one really wants to cross paths with him. People aren’t daring enough to start messing with Mark Lee.

“It really isn’t any of your business”, one of the bullies answers to Mark. Okay, maybe this idiot is daring enough to start messing with Mark. Mark raises his eyebrows a little.

“Look, I’m giving your pathetic asses three seconds to scramble away from here, before this turns ugly. I advise you to take up on those seconds and leave”, Mark says calmly, but dead-serious. The guy who has been talking with Mark looks almost like he wants to say something snarky, but his friends tug him moving. The group leaves quietly but quickly.

“Thought so”, Mark says to himself. Then he turns to look at Donghyuck who’s holding his hand on the spot on his head that hit the stone fence. The younger looks still slightly dizzy.

“Hey, are you okay?” Mark asks. Donghyuck looks at him. Mark’s previously deadly glare has turned into a worried look. Donghyuck has never seen the older look worried before. Actually, he has only ever seen him look completely emotionless. But now there’s no doubt actual worry in his gaze. Donghyuck can’t help but to feel surprised.

“Yeah, just give me a second”, Donghyuck answers and collects himself a little. He’s been leaning on the fence. Now he moves to stand properly. He takes a look around. His books, papers, pens and everything else that were in his backpack before, are scattered on the ground. There’s a slight layer of snow on the ground. Donghyuck sighs, his papers are going to be all wet when he puts them back into his bag.

Mark, too, takes notice of the things lying on the ground. He proceeds to start picking them up.

“Do they do this a lot?” he asks Donghyuck.

“Yeah”, Donghyuck sighs and goes to fetch his backpack that the guy threw along the street. When he comes back, Mark hands him his books and papers gathered to one neat stack. Donghyuck mutters a thank you to him.

“Why?” Mark asks then. Why indeed, Donghyuck thinks bitterly. Because he’s gay. That shouldn’t be a reason, but somehow it is. Suddenly Donghyuck feels a little scared. Should he tell Mark? What if Mark too is a homophobe. He did stop Donghyuck from getting beaten up, but maybe he beats him up himself if he learns that Donghyuck is gay. Everyone in this godforsaken city seems to be homophobes so Donghyuck is hardly surprised if Mark is too. But then again, Mark is going to find out anyway, so better just get it over with.

“Because I’m gay”, Donghyuck says and then settles to wait for Mark’s reaction.

Mark lets out a long sigh. It is the kind of sigh that tells he’s completely and utterly tired and disappointed with everything and everyone. “I hate people”, he then says quietly. It’s been a long time since Donghyuck has related to something as much as he does to the sigh and sentence Mark just gave. Mark bends down to pick the few pencils that are still on the ground and gives them to Donghyuck.

“Come on, I’ll walk you home. You hit your head pretty badly”, the older then says and motions Donghyuck to start walking with him. Donghyuck complies. He doesn’t live very far away so it doesn’t take long for them to reach his house. They don’t really speak during the walk. Donghyuck is concentrating on the throbbing pain in his head.

“Thanks for helping me and walking me home”, Donghyuck says when they stop in front of his home.

“It was nothing”, Mark says and smiles slightly. Donghyuck mirrors the small smile and then he turns to walk to his door.

“Hey, what’s your name by the way?”, Mark asks Donghyuck just when he is about to open the door. The younger turns back to look at Mark who’s still standing there.

“Donghyuck”, Donghyuck answers. Mark nods.

“I’m Mark”, he tells then. Donghyuck resists the urge to say ‘I know’ and opts to just nod. They stare at each other for a moment, not knowing what to say next. So Donghyuck just opens the door finally. He gives Mark a quick wave before stepping inside. The older salutes him back and then walks away. Donghyuck closes the door.

  
\-------

  
On Monday at lunchtime Donghyuck is up on the school’s roof, eating his lunch. It is few degrees below zero outside, so not exactly a picnic weather. Donghyuck has jacket on and the hood drawn over his head. He doesn’t have gloves though, so his fingers are pretty frozen. But it is nice and peaceful on the roof. He takes frozen fingers any day over eating his lunch inside.

Suddenly Donghyuck hears the door to the roof creaking. His heart jumps immediately to his throat. The roof has been his safe place from the bullies, if they now figure this place out, Donghyuck doesn’t know what to do anymore. He watches with wide eyes when the door opens. To his huge relief it isn’t any of his bullies.

It is Mark. The red-haired boy peeks to the roof and notices Donghyuck sitting next to the edge of the roof. He steps through the open door and closes it then behind him. He walks up to Donghyuck and sits next to him. The older is again wearing some black clothes, boots and leather jacket.

“Isn’t it a little cold here to be eating outside?” Mark muses.

“A little, yeah, but it still wins over eating inside” Donghyuck says. Mark hums. Donghyuck finishes his sandwich, scrunching the plastic wrapper where the sandwich came in. He puts it in his backpack and simultaneously takes an apple out of the bag. He takes a bite from the apple and then offers it to Mark. The older takes the apple from him and takes a bite. They take turns eating it.

It's pretty funny actually. Here Donghyuck is, sharing an apple with an alleged criminal. Though he doesn’t really know if he believes the rumors. He tries not to judge people if they don’t give him a good reason. That kind of behavior just ruins people’s lives. He’s a living example of that.

Maybe Mark is a criminal, maybe he isn’t. Whatever the case, he’s still the only person who doesn’t seem to care that Donghyuck is gay. Call Donghyuck desperate, but if there’s someone he can spend time with, he’s going to take it even if they’re a criminal.

But that doesn’t mean he isn’t curious.

“Mark, can I ask you something?”

“Sure”

“Are you a criminal? Or in a gang or something?”

“Hm, can I trust you?”

“I’m pretty sure I’m the only person in this goddamned city that you can actually trust”, Donghyuck answers bitterly.

“You’re probably right”, Mark agrees. “And no, I’m not in a gang or any sort of a criminal. But I want people to think so. That way they leave me alone. I’m pretty sure you get it”

“Yeah, I do”, Donghyuck says and sighs.

The bell rings, signaling that they have to head to class. Donghyuck gets up, but Mark stays sitting.

“Aren’t you going to class?” Donghyuck asks.

“Nah, I don’t like science”

Donghyuck nods. He doesn’t like science either. Actually he doesn’t like pretty much any of the subjects. It’s probably same for Mark. But Donghyuck still has to go to class. If his parents would somehow find out that he’s been skipping classes, that would be the end of him. And life might be complete shit now, but he still wants to live.

“Okay, well, I have to go. I’ll see you later?” Donghyuck asks. He’s not going to lie, he really hopes that Mark wants to spend more time with him.

“Yeah”, Mark says and smiles. Donghyuck smiles and then he leaves the roof. He goes to the classroom and gets some nasty things said to him. Nothing new there.

  
\-------

  
They eat lunch on the roof in the cold January air the whole week. Sometimes they talk, sometimes they just sit in a comfortable silence. They share their likes and dislikes, talk about who’s the best and who’s the worst teacher, tell stupid jokes, and argue about something petty like which one is the best Disney movie. The kind of things with what you can get to know each other a little, but still keep things light.

Donghyuck can see and sense that life isn’t too light for Mark either. He can see the dark circles under the older’s eyes and how tired his eyes just generally look. There is some bruising on Mark’s neck and even if it doesn’t come from gang fights, it still comes from somewhere. Donghyuck wants to ask, but he knows that it's still too early for that.

Donghyuck really enjoys Mark’s company. But he can’t help but to feel insecure. Why is Mark hanging out with him? What if it’s actually just some plot to embarrass the younger later. Okay, Mark doesn’t seem like the type to do something like that. But maybe the older just feels sorry for Donghyuck? He saw the younger getting bullied, stopped it and took so much pity on him that he now hangs out with him?

But then again, Mark actually seems like he, too, enjoys Donghyuck’s company. Donghyuck doesn’t see the older smiling anywhere else, but he smiles when he’s with Donghyuck. He also laughs really easily to things Donghyuck says and he actually listens to what Donghyuck has to say. And they can also just sit in silence without it feeling weird.

So maybe Mark genuinely seeks out for Donghyuck’s company like Donghyuck seeks out for his?

Because maybe Mark is just simply just as lonely as Donghyuck.

  
\--------

  
Donghyuck looks at himself from the mirror. He has put some eyeliner, eyeshadow and mascara on. His parents aren’t home, so he used the opportunity to put on some of his mother’s makeup. He does it sometimes when he’s sure he won’t get caught.

He really likes makeup; it makes him feel pretty. The eyeliner highlights the shape of his eyes, the mascara makes his eyelashes show better and the eyeshadow sparkles beautifully. He wishes he could just use makeup whenever he feels like it.

But boys don’t wear makeup. That’s what everyone always says. That’s what Donghyuck’s parents say. Only gay men use makeup and as far as Donghyuck’s parents are concerned, their perfect son could never be gay. So no makeup home. And definitely no makeup in school either. Donghyuck doesn’t have a death wish.

He sighs and walks to the bathroom. He washes the makeup away.

  
\-------

  
“Fucking faggot!” some guy exclaims and shoves Donghyuck against the lockers while walking past him. Donghyuck regains his composure and is about to continue walking, when someone suddenly yanks hard from the hood of his hoodie. Donghyuck startles at the sudden lack of air and the pain in his throat.

“Where do you think you’re going?” the one yanking his hood says. Luckily he at least lets go of the hood and Donghyuck is able to breathe properly. Donghyuck should have known he wasn’t going to just leave the school without some kind of incident. There are some people lining around him and the bully, obviously waiting for some sort of a show. Donghyuck swallows.

But before anything else has time to happen, the people suddenly turn their attention behind the bully. The guy doesn’t have time to react, before he’s suddenly the one being pulled hard from his hood. The guy loses his balance and falls to the ground. Donghyuck looks at him surprised and then he looks at Mark, who’s the one that brought the bully down.

Mark steps over the guy and walks next to Donghyuck.

“What are you, his boyfriend now, huh?” some girl spits at Mark.

“What if I am, do you have a problem with that?” Mark answers and gives the girl a look so dirty that she flinches involuntarily. The girl doesn’t dare to say anything more.

“I suggest you all leave Donghyuck alone if you don’t want any problems”, Mark says coldly to the people. It is almost comical how everyone stiffens up. Then the older turns to Donghyuck and throws his arm around the younger’s shoulders.

“Come on, let’s go”, Mark whispers. He tugs Donghyuck moving. His keeps his arm around Donghyuck until they reach the front door. Then he detaches himself from the younger to open the door. They step into the school yard and walk across it and out of the school premises.

“Thank you, Mark”, Donghyuck says. “Though I’m not sure if you should defend me like that, they will turn against you too. Especially now if they think you’re my boyfriend. I don’t want you to get hurt too”, he continues then, feeling guilty of the idea of Mark getting into trouble because of him.

“Well, do you expect me to just stand back and watch when they assault you? I already feel like shit that I didn’t notice you and that you were being bullied before. I could have done something a long time ago”, Mark says with troubled voice.

“Well, it’s hardly your job, don’t you think”, Donghyuck whispers.

“If there’s any way I can help you, I want to do it. You don’t deserve any of this. You know, you’re really funny and sweet person and if people would just open their minds even a crack, they would realize that”, Mark answers. Donghyuck doesn’t know what to say or feel. He’s not used to someone actually caring about him. At least not the real him. He can feel the tears welling up in his eyes. Mark notices.

“Hey, don’t cry”, he turns to look worried and takes a step closer to Donghyuck.

“Well, then don’t go around saying all those nice things”, Donghyuck sniffles and dries his eyes to his sleeve. Mark chuckles a little.

“But you know, I don’t think you should be worried about everyone turning against me. They won’t have the guts to do anything. You see, my gang might just retaliate them if they do something to me”, Mark grins.

Donghyuck laughs. “That’s true. They really seem to believe that you’re a dangerous criminal”

Mark hums. Then he throws his arm over Donghyuck’s shoulders again.

“Let’s go, I’ll walk you home”, the older smiles.

  
\-------

  
“Hey Mark, I was wondering if you’d want to hang out after school?”, Donghyuck asks the older. They’re again sitting on the roof. It’s been a few weeks since they started to spend time together in school, and now Donghyuck has finally gathered enough courage to ask if Mark would want to hang out outside of school too.

“Oh, I actually have to work after school...” Mark starts. Oh, that’s right. Mark has a part-time job, he mentioned it at some point to Donghyuck. Was it in a convenience store, or a gas station, Donghyuck tries to remember. “...but you know, if you want you could come there with me. I’m always working alone and there’s not really many customers around usually”, Mark continues and proposes then.

“Yeah, sure, sounds good”, Donghyuck smiles.

“Nice! I just hope you don’t mind the walk, the gas station is at the outskirts of the city so it takes around forty minutes to walk there from here”

“I don’t mind, I like walking”, Donghyuck says. It’s true and he actually goes walking quite often. He doesn’t want to be home all the time, but he doesn’t really have any other place to go either, so he just ends up strolling around.

“Cool. Meet me at the gate after school”, Mark smiles. Donghyuck nods. The bell rings and they get up to go to class. They separate in the corridor. Sadly, they don’t share any classes. Donghyuck goes to the classroom little late, the teacher is already there so no one says anything bad to Donghyuck. He breathes in relief.

  
\-------

  
After school Donghyuck meets Mark at the gate like they agreed. They take off walking towards the gas station where Mark works at. Luckily the weather is rather warm for early February and the winter sun is also shining, making it really nice to be outside and walking.

They talk about all kinds of meaningless things most of the walk. Little before they are in their destination, they fall into a comfortable silence. Except that it turns to be not-comfortable for Donghyuck. He itches to ask Mark about something, even if it still was way too early for it.

“Mark, can I ask you about something personal?” Donghyuck asks carefully.

“It’s about the bruises, isn’t it?”

“Yeah”

Mark is silent for a moment, before letting out a long sigh. “It’s my dad who causes them. He gets violent when he’s drunk”

Donghyuck knew the answer was going to be something like this. Of course he knew. Still it doesn’t stop his heart from breaking a little.

“He’s a truck driver, so luckily he’s away often. Obviously he can’t drink when he’s working, so whenever he comes home, drinking is all he does. When he’s sober, he doesn’t usually pay me any mind. I mean I know he doesn’t like me, but at least when he’s sober he just leaves me alone. But when he’s drunk and I'm there...” Mark doesn’t finish the sentence.

Donghyuck thinks about all the times over the years in high school, when he’s seen Mark walking past him. There have been multiple times that the older has had a black eye, swollen cheek, busted lip, bruised neck... God knows what has been under his clothes where others can’t see. Everyone has just always assumed that they come from Mark attending to fights. No one has ever even tried to ask if there’s something else behind the injuries.

“My mom left when I was twelve. My dad blames me for it and lets it show when he’s drunk. You know, it’s a miracle he hasn’t just kicked me out. I’m pretty sure it’s because he’s so stupid that he thinks that social services would blame him for something if he kicked me out while I'm still in high school. Even if I'm legally adult”, Mark lets out a bitter laugh.

“I would move out in a heartbeat if it was possible. But you know, it always comes to money. I’m working to save up as much as possible. You know, I don’t like school and that’s one reason why I skip classes but on those days that I skip the whole day, it’s because I got a shift during the morning and afternoon. I rarely turn down shifts because I really need the money.

After high school, I’m going to go to vocational school to study to be a mechanic. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do. I used to have a moped when I was a teenager, but then my dad sold it to take the money and buy alcohol... Anyway, I’ve decided on a school in a city across the country. I want to get the hell away from here as soon as I finish high school.

I'm saving up to be able to move across the country, get an apartment and go to school there. That’s why I haven’t moved out yet. It would be idiotic to spend money on a rent here. It’s only about four months left anymore anyway, I have endured this a long time already, so it’s basically nothing.”

Donghyuck isn’t the only one counting months it seems.

They arrive to the gas station before Donghyuck has time to say anything. They walk inside and Mark greets the worker who is able to leave now that has Mark arrived. They exchange few words and then the guy is off to go. Mark walks behind the counter and disappears to staff only –room for a moment. Then he comes back, clothed in his work shirt. Mark motions Donghyuck to join him behind the counter.

Donghyuck walks there and then he walks right in front of Mark. He doesn’t hesitate and just wraps his arms around the older and hugs him tightly. Donghyuck doesn’t care if they’re really this far into their friendship or not. Mark responds to the hug.

“Mark, I’m so sorry”, Donghyuck whispers. “You do know that none if it is your fault, right?”, Donghyuck waits until he feels Mark nod against his shoulder.

“I wish there was something I could do... But just know that I’m here for you, and I’ll listen if you want to talk about it more”, Donghyuck says. The sad truth is that there’s so little he can do to help Mark. He can’t make Mark’s dad disappear, he can’t take Mark to his home, his parents would never allow that, he doesn’t have money to help Mark pay rent... Sometimes it feels just devastating to be so inadequate.

“Thank you Donghyuck. Like I said, luckily he’s away a lot and I don’t have to see him”

“Good. But promise me this: tell me immediately when he comes home”

“Okay”

“Promise?”

“I promise”

Donghyuck nods and then he finally lets go of Mark. There are two wonky stools behind the counter, Donghyuck sits on one and Mark on the other. They continue the day normally, like they hadn’t just had a heartfelt moment.

  
\-------

  
It becomes a regular thing. Donghyuck accompanies Mark to the gas station whenever the older has a shift after school. Sometimes Donghyuck stays the whole shift until the evening. On those occasions he tells his parents that he has a lot of school work and projects to do, so he spends the evenings in the library. It is stupid that he’s an adult but still has to keep his parents updated of his whereabouts. But according to his father: my house, my rules. Well, obviously Donghyuck doesn’t tell what he’s really up to. His parents would completely flip out if they knew Donghyuck wasn’t studying hard this close to the finals.

Luckily for Donghyuck, he doesn’t have to cram to get good grades. It is enough that he attends to classes and does his homework somewhat decently. Donghyuck doesn’t like academic stuff. But his parents truly believe that he does. Donghyuck has been pretending for years to be a diligent student who uses a lot of his free time on studying. That’s how his parents leave him alone. Donghyuck will close the door to his room, saying that he will study and then in reality he listens to music, surfs on the internet, watches movies and so on.

Now instead of those things, he hangs out with Mark. Which is at least 110% better.

“Donghyuck?” Mark, who’s sitting next to him on the uncomfortable stool, asks carefully.

“Hm?” Donghyuck hums.

“Your parents are very homophobic and, in every way, old-fashioned, right?”

“Yeah”, Donghyuck sighs tiredly.

“Tell me, what do they expect for you to do with your life?”

“Let’s see. I’m supposed to finish high school with top grades. With those grades I’m able to get into a good university where I study something academic that guarantees me a respected and well-paid job. Then I need to find a good-natured, beautiful girlfriend who later becomes my wife. We get couple of kids, a house, a big car and a dog. Then we visit my parents often so that they can be a part of their grandchildren’s lives as much as possible”, Donghyuck tells, his voice turning more bitter with every word. Mark nods.

“And now tell me, what is it that you want?”, the older then asks after a moment. Donghyuck’s brain shuts down for a second. No one has ever asked him that before. Donghyuck blinks a few times and then composes himself.

“I want to move somewhere very far away from here. I don’t want to go to university or any kind of academic field. I want to become a baker and work in a bakery or a coffee shop. I want a boyfriend who loves me and who I love, without people constantly judging us. I want to be able to use makeup and not feel bad about myself. I don’t want a house, kids or cars. I want me, my boyfriend and a smallish apartment somewhere in a big city. I want a simple life and I want to be happy”, Donghyuck tells honestly.

“Sounds completely reasonable to me”, Mark says.

“Yeah.. I used to think so too. Now I’m not so sure anymore”, Donghyuck muses quietly.

“I’m sure you will get those things”

“You think so?”

“I do”, Mark says, sounding sure. Donghyuck can’t help but to feel skeptical, but of course he really hopes so.

“How about you?” Donghyuck then asks.

“Well, it’s pretty same for me. Like you know, I want to move across the country, to a big city and become a mechanic. I, too, want a boyfriend who I love and who loves me. I want to come home from work at reasonable hours and then he and I can go out and enjoy the small things in life. I want to be happy”, Mark tells.

Donghyuck smiles. It doesn’t sound so out of reach when someone else says it. And also, Mark just casually came out to him. Donghyuck reaches to take Mark’s hand in his and gives it a reassuring squeeze.

“Sounds completely reasonable to me”, the younger says then. Mark smiles, eyes twinkling a little.

  
\-------

  
On one Saturday Mark and Donghyuck take a bus and travel to another city. Mark has a day off from work so they came up the idea to do something different. They decided on traveling to another city and to going to wander in a big mall there. Maybe they'll even buy something. Donghyuck insisted on paying both of their bus tickets so that Mark wouldn’t use his money on it. The older resisted for a long time and only agreed when Donghyuck promised that Mark can offer him a drink or something in a coffee shop.

The mall is big and there’s endless number of stores in five floors. It feels really good to wander around and not be afraid that they would come across some nasty people from their city. They do a lot of window shopping and sometimes even dare to enter the stores. Donghyuck ends up buying a t-shirt to wait for the summer.

They walk past a makeup store. Donghyuck looks at the shop little longingly and Mark notices.

“Let’s go inside and have a look”, the older says.

“What? No, I don’t-”

“Come on!” Mark says and drags the younger to the shop. Luckily the shop is big and there are a lot of other customers too, so no one pays any mind to them. Donghyuck sighs in relief. They walk around and look at the products. They stop in front of a selection of all kinds of eyeshadows.

“You know, I don’t really know anything about makeup, but I think this color would look great on you” Mark muses and hands Donghyuck a tester palette with eyeshadow in sparkling gold shade, “You should try it on”

Donghyuck feels all warm inside. If Mark isn’t the most kind and supportive friend ever, Donghyuck doesn’t know who is. He takes the palette from the older. He walks to a mirror and carefully applies some of the sparkling eyeshadow on his eyelids. Donghyuck comes back to where Mark is standing.

The older looks at him delighted. “I knew it. You look amazing”

Well, now Donghyuck feels like blushing. He mumbles a shy thank you.

“We are definitely buying this one”, Mark says then and takes a brand-new packet of the eyeshadow from the shelf. Donghyuck looks at him with wide eyes.

“I can keep it in my bag or something, so you don’t have to take it to your home in case your parents would somehow notice. Then you can use this whenever we go out somewhere where there isn’t assholes all around”, Mark says smiling.

And now Donghyuck feels like crying. He doesn’t deserve Mark.

Donghyuck nods gingerly and Mark proceeds to walk towards the counter.

“Hey, I’m paying it though! I’m the one who’s going to use it anyway!” Donghyuck exclaims and runs after the older.

“No. You paid the bus tickets already, I’m paying this”, Mark says with a tone that leaves no room for discussion. Donghyuck sighs. Damn bus tickets. Donghyuck waits while Mark pays for the eyeshadow and then comes back with a small plastic bag in his hand. He gives it to Donghyuck.

“Thank you”, Donghyuck says. “For everything”, he then adds quietly, but loud enough for Mark to hear.

“Don’t mention it”, the older smiles and gives Donghyuck a side hug. Donghyuck resists the urge to wrap his both hands tightly around Mark.

“Now, come on, let’s go get milkshakes”, Mark then says and proceeds to skip happily ahead of Donghyuck.

“Sure, but I’m paying!” Donghyuck says and Mark groans. Donghyuck laughs.

  
\-------

  
Donghyuck startles awake when his phone suddenly rings. Automatically he first checks the time before actually answering the phone. 1:28 am. The caller is Mark. Donghyuck’s heart misses a beat. Why is Mark calling at this hour?

“Mark? Is everything alright?” Donghyuck answers to the phone, worry coloring his voice.

“ _Hey Hyuck, sorry to wake you up. It’s just... Well you told me to tell you immediately if my dad comes home.._ ”

Donghyuck jumps out of the bed.

“Where are you?” he asks.

“ _I was home a while after he came, but then he started drinking obviously, so I left. I’m at the park near my house, you know the one_ ”

Donghyuck keeps his phone between his ear and shoulder and pulls pants to his legs.

“Okay, stay there. I’ll be there in ten”, he says and takes a hoodie from his closet.

“ _What? Wait, no-_ ”

“See you soon!” Donghyuck says and hangs up the phone so that the older can’t protest. He puts on rest of the clothes he needs and then tiptoes to get his shoes and jacket from the hallway. He comes back to his room and then opens the window. Thank God they have a single-storey house. Donghyuck jumps out of the window. He leaves it open just enough to be able to open it again when he comes back. Then he proceeds to take his bike and start pedaling towards the park near Mark’s house.

When he arrives to the park, he sees Mark sitting on one of the swings. Donghyuck leaves the bike next to the park’s fence and jogs up to the older. Mark raises his gaze from the ground.

“When I called, I really didn’t mean for you to come here”, the older says.

“Of course I’ll come. He didn’t lay a hand on you, did he?” Donghyuck asks immediately.

“No, I left before that had time to happen”, Mark answers. Donghyuck lets out a breath he’s been holding on. He sits to the swing next to Mark’s.

“But seriously Hyuck, you shouldn’t be here”

“If things were reverse wouldn’t you come?”

“Well, yeah, but-”

“See! Besides, you help me all the time, so at least let me keep you company in a park on a crisp spring night”

“Fine”, Mark sighs. He’s quiet for a moment, before whispering: “Thank you”

Donghyuck smiles and then he proceeds to kick the swing moving. Mark does the same. They swing in an empty, dark park, while cold spring breeze whirls around them.

  
\-------

  
“Donghyuck, please open the door!” Mark is pounding on the door. Donghyuck is sitting inside school’s bathroom, crying.

Since Mark started spending time with Donghyuck, the bullying has immensely decreased. Mark spends all the breaks and lunches with Donghyuck, meaning that they are always left alone. Also on those days that Mark isn’t in school, people don’t usually dare to lay a hand on Donghyuck anymore.

But the verbal abuse still goes on regularly. It’s always right before and after classes, when Mark or the teacher aren’t around. Usually Donghyuck just tries to ignore the horrible things said to him and often succeeds in it, but sometimes it’s all just too much.

Today is one of those days. Their teacher was gone half of the class, helping their principal with something and leaving the students to do an assignment in the classroom by themselves. Nothing was said directly at Donghyuck, but instead the bullies kept talking about him behind his back. Except that obviously they knew Donghyuck could hear them and that was the whole point in it.

When the class finally ended, Donghyuck bolted out of the classroom, holding his tears until he got to the bathroom. He ran past Mark who was coming to spend their break together. Mark ran after Donghyuck, but the younger managed to lock himself in the bathroom before Mark could catch him.

“Donghyuck, _please_ ”, Mark is sounding desperate now. Donghyuck waits for a little whole longer, before finally leaning to click the lock open. Mark immediately opens the door, steps inside and then closes the door behind him, locking it again. He kneels in front of Donghyuck, who’s sitting on the toilet, figure hunched, and his face hidden on his hands.

Mark takes a soft grip on Donghyuck’s wrists and removes the hands from the younger’s face. He’s met with red, puffy and wet eyes. Donghyuck tries to turn his face away, but Mark lifts his hands on either side of Donghyuck’s face, stopping the younger.

“Donghyuck, whatever they said, you know that it’s not true, right? None of the things those assholes say are true. But you know what is true? That you are the most amazing, the most beautiful person I have met and ever could meet. You are worth everything", Mark says, pouring out every drop of sincerity he has, hoping that the younger will believe him. Because he’s telling the absolute truth.

Donghyuck lifts his hands on top of Mark’s that are on his cheeks and then pulls them away so that he can interlace their fingers. Mark leans closer and presses his lips on Donghyuck’s. It’s a simple, soft kiss, and Donghyuck thinks nothing has ever felt so good. So right.

“Don’t cry. Not over some ugly lies”, Mark whispers when they break apart. Donghyuck lets go of Mark’s hands and wraps his arms around the older.

“I don’t know what I would do without you”, Donghyuck whispers face pressed into the crook of Mark's neck, while hugging the older tightly.

“Right back at you. Luckily we don’t need to find out”, Mark whispers, hugging the younger just as tightly back.

  
\-------

  
Donghyuck steps inside the gas station. He doesn’t see Mark behind the counter.

“Mark?” Donghyuck exclaims.

“Yeah, I’m at the back!” the older shouts from the staff only –room. Donghyuck walks there, not caring that he isn’t staff. It's not like he hasn’t done it a hundred times before anyway.

“Hey baby”, Mark greets him and pecks him on the lips. “Did you send out your applications?”

Today is the last day to send out applications to universities, polytechnics and vocational schools. Donghyuck has been putting off sending his. He knows what his parents want and expect him to do. He also knows what he wants to do. And for the first time in his life he’s finally decided to do exactly what he wants.

It feels exhilarating, but also scary as hell. After spending his whole life trying to reach his parents’ expectations, it’s pretty daunting idea to go against them. But Donghyuck is absolutely tired of trying to please other people. He deserves more than that.

“Yeah, I did”, Donghyuck answers.

“And?”

“Well, you know that vocational school you applied to, to become a mechanic? Turns out they offer also a possibility to study to become a baker. And it is possible to do as an apprenticeship training, so I can study, work and earn money all at the same time. So guess what, you’re stuck with me!”

“Oh my God, Hyuck!” Mark exclaims and wraps his arms around Donghyuck. He literally lifts the younger from the ground and twirls them around couple times. Then he puts Donghyuck down, just to pepper the younger’s whole face with light kisses. Donghyuck giggles. He’s pretty sure this is the happiest he has ever seen Mark.

“You’re really moving with me?” Mark has to still confirm, just to check he’s not dreaming.

“Yes! Now we just have to wait until the graduation, and then we are out of here”, Donghyuck says and smiles widely. Mark mirrors his expression. Donghyuck puts his hands on Mark’s nape and then pulls the older to a proper kiss. Mark’s lips are soft and warm, and they taste like comfort and home.

“Mark, I love you”, Donghyuck says when they break the kiss. He looks at the older’s dark eyes that seem to hold the universe.

“And I love you”, Mark smiles. He traces his fingers gently across the side of Donghyuck’s face and then tucks the younger’s short hair behind his ear. The loving gesture sends butterflies in Donghyuck’s stomach. He pecks the older’s lips again, before saying:

“Good. Now, where’s my eyeshadow? I feel like using it today”

Mark laughs and then moves to get the eyeshadow from his bag. He hands it to Donghyuck, who walks to a mirror and applies the sparkling gold to his eyelids. He turns back to Mark and flutters his eyelashes.

“How do I look?”

“Stunning. As always”, Mark smiles. He walks up to Donghyuck and gives the younger kiss on the forehead. Then he proceeds to walk through the door to the store area of the gas station, leaving Donghyuck to the staff room.

“Hey, kiss me properly, you coward!”

  
\-------

  
The finals come and go. Donghyuck succeeds well, especially considering how little effort he put to study for them. Mark doesn’t succeed nearly as good, but he’s just happy he passed everything.

The graduation finally rolls around. It is commonly a happy day, but for Mark and Donghyuck it means a lot more. It is a happy day, sure, but even more than that it is a huge relief and a start for something new and amazing.

Donghyuck’s parents come to see the ceremony to the school. They have also planned and organized a party to celebrate for Donghyuck’s graduation. They have invited all possible people they can think of and Donghyuck knows it’s more of a social gathering to them than it is a real celebration about Donghyuck and his graduation. But Donghyuck doesn’t mind. The guests bring him money as a gift, and money is exactly what Donghyuck needs now.

Donghyuck has decided to come clean about everything the day after the graduation. He’s going to tell his parents that he’s gay and has a boyfriend with whom he’s moving on the other side of the country and that there he’s going to study to become a baker. He doesn’t have high hopes for the talk, but it has to be done. Donghyuck is done pretending.

  
\-------

  
Donghyuck drags himself and his two heavy bags to the front door of Mark’s house. He knocks on the door. Mark opens it and notices right away that Donghyuck doesn’t look good. He moves to hug the younger and Donghyuck bursts into tears immediately. Mark pulls him inside and to sit on the couch. He holds the shaking younger against his chest.

“T-they s-said that I don’t need come back. T-that they don’t ever w-want to see me again”, Donghyuck tells between sobs. Mark’s heart breaks a little.

Donghyuck knew this was how his parents were going to react. He knew it perfectly, but it still hurts. Because there was always the small hope. The teeny tiny hope, that maybe, just maybe they would somehow accept him in the end.

Hope is funny that way. Hope is a resource that helps people get though a lot. It is something really important for survival and for strength to keep going on.

But also, sometimes hope is just simply your worst enemy.

Mark hugs Donghyuck and keeps gently wiping the tears from his cheeks. The younger cries for hours, until there’s nothing left anymore. Donghyuck feels a lot lighter afterwards. He knows he’ll be fine with time.

  
\--------

  
Donghyuck takes his bags and Mark takes his own. The older doesn’t leave a note or anything. He just sets the key on the kitchen table and then they walk out of the house. Mark closes the door behind him and gives the house one last look. He knows he won’t be coming back.

They walk to the train station and board the train. It will be a fifteen-hour long journey. Mark lets Donghyuck take the window seat. Not that it matters in the end, since Donghyuck and Mark both are fast asleep in no time. All the sad emotions they’ve been through, mixed with the absolute excitement of the new beginning, are all taking a toll on both of them.

“Donghyuck”, Mark shakes the younger lightly. Donghyuck wakes up grudgingly and looks at Mark.

“Baby, we are almost there”, Mark smiles. Donghyuck looks out of the train’s window. They are at the outskirts of a metropolis. Donghyuck stretches a little on his chair and then leans to give a peck on Mark’s lips.

“That was some good fifteen-hour long nap”, Donghyuck muses smiling. Mark chuckles. They get up from their seats and take their bags from the shelf. It takes another ten minutes for the train to pull up on the platform. The doors open and the boys step out. The train station is buzzing with people.

Donghyuck and Mark wander around the huge train station until they finally find the main exit. The boys step out and into the new city. It’s amazing. The city is at least ten times bigger than the one they are coming from. This city immediately overflows with international, multicultural and open feeling. Donghyuck knows somewhere here is a small apartment already rented in their names.

Donghyuck looks at the bustling metropolis in front of him. Then he turns to look at Mark. The older smiles at him. Donghyuck takes Mark’s hand in his and then he gives the older a soft kiss on the lips.

This is it. This is what Donghyuck wants, and what was always supposed to happen.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, I hope you liked it! All kinds of feedback is obviously very appreciated! <3


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